It seems that so much of one's success hinges on who you know and who they know and what they're all willing do to for you. It's all about connections. That's why popular sites such as Linkedin exist; so that people can network in hopes of catching a break when their career unexpectedly ends up in the shitter. That's how I see it, anyway. Maybe it's for proactive career advancement and expanding business associations. Whatever it's for, I hate it and I'm not good at it and I don't want to network or connect with anyone on a business level (surprise, surprise), unless maybe if it's for my own business and I'm fighting tooth and nail to make it successful . But to use it to show others that I'm important enough to associate with Directors or VPs, or as a way to cast myself based on my job title, no thanks! The last thing I need is to be part of a cyber cocktail party with people I don't particularly like. I can barely manage Facebook and I generally like the people I speak with on there. I don't need another social media site to have to monitor and update. But the byproduct of not participating in such things, and self imposed isolation, is that when you really need a career favor or help in identifying a new opportunity, you're totally screwed. And I mean, SCREWED. You're lumped in with the rest of the faceless others who send resume upon resume to company HR email boxes, never to be responded to or acknowledged. The impact a phone call can make from a VP, Director or a current employee of the company you are trying to penetrate to the hiring manager or HR lead is huge and undeniable. Knowing people opens doors, it creates opportunities. I hate schmoozing and kissing ass; it always feels so forced and contrived. Those who are good at it call it something other than kissing ass; they call it networking. Let's be honest here, there is a fine line between smart people getting together and sharing business ideas and building productive business relationships (networking) and people pretending to like the same things the CEO likes and laughing at his or her jokes in bad taste in hopes of standing out in the crowd, making an impression, catching a break, getting a promotion and making more money so they can buy the same BMW their new boss has (ass kissing). It always feels like there is an ulterior motive. And there is. It frustrates me that those who have mastered this art and who don't mind forcing interactions can do very well for themselves. VERY well. I've seen it with my own two eyes. And it makes me want to puke.
So what to do? My husband is ready to take on a new career direction. He is burned out and is unhappy, to the point of it spilling into his life outside of work. There's nothing worse than being miserable for 8 hours a day and then going home and being miserable at home because your day was shitty. The only relief is maybe Saturday, and that's just not enough. He is incredibly smart, talented, hard working; all the things that make someone a desirable employee. Neither he nor I know enough people nor has he exposed his talents to others in such a way that he would have an "in" someplace. I know how effective word of mouth can be, and we just don't have an advocate out there. So we will trudge along, with the masses, fighting for any opportunity thrown our way and hope that it's something worth his consideration.
If only we could both learn how to put aside our pride, gain a little ego, and pucker up. We'd be so rich.
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